love song.

4 weeks down. 100 to go.

1 week at a time. 1 day at a time. 1 hour at a time. 1 meal at a time. 15 minutes at a time.

This is my key to survival. Every day is a new day with these kids. They are unpredictable in their moods, behaviors, and feelings.

I spent my first night alone in the woods with my campers this week. 9 out of 12 campers left to go home for the weekend leaving me with 3 campers and a camper that was switched to my group for the weekend.

Lessons learned:

I am a failure with fire.
- I can't build a fire. I need 14 year olds to help me.
- I can clean out a potbelly, but I leave the ashes in a bucket smoldering in the tent only to come back to their tent later that afternoon to find it full of smoke.
- I burn myself constantly with my lighter.
- Kerosene is my worst enemy.

I find my kids far too amusing for their own good.
- My laughing at their behavior does not help them alter their behavior. It encourages it.
- This can be illustrated by the 90 minutes I spent following a camper who decided to hug every tree down the trails and whisper, "It's okay buddy. I love you." My laughing at this situation did not help him move on to more appropriate and timely behaviors.

I am a scaredy cat.
- Sleeping in the woods is tough. Especially when it rains. I woke up every 30 minutes thinking a camper was in my tent, that a branch had fallen through the top tarp, that I was suffocating in my mummy sleeping bag.

Never interrupt the sleep of a teenage boy.
- Middle of the night huddles are awful. Night Watch suspected that my campers had stolen a flashlight and broken into the education building at 4 am two nights ago. I have my own opinion of whether or not they did such a thing. Regardless, teenage boys being woken up in the middle of the night to the accusations of being thieves is not a pretty sight. I hope I never see that again.

All in all, I really like my campers. They are hilarious. I think highly of so many of them--I hope they give me a chance to tell them this.

I went to church today, and the pastor was talking about how important it is for us to know what OUR will for our lives is, so we don't project it on to God's will for our lives. I think if I were to be God, I would have matched me up with a brilliant and strong man that would want to go on adventures with me all over the world and then settle down in a cozy home close to my family. God's will for my life is obviously different at this point in time, and I continue to be amazed by what God is doing and has done. I am living an adventure.

I'll end this with the lyrics to a song we sang this morning that hit home with me:

Where can I go, where can I run
From you, you're everywhere
You know all my thoughts
You see all my ways
And still, you come to me

From heaven above, to earth down below
Your love, rains down on me
You know where I've been
You see through my skin
And still, you come to me

You walk on waves
You run with clouds
You paint the sky for me to see
Your majesty, your majesty is why I sing

This is a love song to you.

My life is a love song to you.